Famous Funerals

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“Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.” Ambrose Bierce

 

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…but then again a few too many to mention! We doubt the following stars would regret how their death reflected the way they lived their life.

Want something special written on your headstone, or have a particular “hearse” in mind? Make a note of it in your own Funeral Plan.

 

  • Founder of the Body Shop Anita Roddick, who died last year, opted for a camper van to be used as her hearse. Peace out sista!

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  • The best is yet to come
    The epitaph on Frank Sinatra’s headstone.
  • What’s inside Frank Sinatra’s coffin? The question has caused quite a lot of gossip and speculation over the years. Family and friends were reported to have put Tootsie Rolls and Life Saver candies, chewing gum, a mini bottle of Jack Daniels, a pack of camel lights and a Zippo lighter, in with Ole Blue Eyes. Ten dimes were also placed in the casket, just in case he needed to make an emergency call!
    • Keith Richards, of Rolling Stones fame, has recently admitted to snorting his late father’s ashes with a couple of lines of cocaine. He later retracted the claim but we tend to believe his original line … only he nose!

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  • Playboy founder Hugh Hefner has bought a plot next to Marilyn Monroe. He says that he wants to be buried next to the most beautiful woman that ever lived.
  • According to one of his daughters, when on his death bed, Bob Hope was asked where he would like to be buried. The comedian raised an eyebrow and answered, “Surprise me.”
  • He would have wanted it that way,” were the words used by ‘revellers’ to justify the shenanigans at Punk rocker GG Allin’s funeral. He was buried in a leather jacket and jock strap that said “Eat me”. He had a microphone in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other. During his wake, when his guests ran out of alcohol, they simply helped themselves to the bottle in his casket. Women were said to have placed their panties on his face, had their photos taken with him and played with a certain part of his anatomy. A shameless way to treat a stiff…
  • I told you I was ill.
    The words inscribed on Spike Milligan’s tombstone.
    • Free at last, free at last. Thank God Almighty I’m free at last.
      The words inscribed on Martin Luther King’s tombstone.
    • James Brown, who died on Christmas Day 2006, insisted on being laid to rest in a 24 Karat gold coffin. Apparently it made him feel good…

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  • After her death in 1952, Evita’s embalmed body went mysteriously missing for 16 years. It was eventually discovered in a crypt in Italy, under the name “Maria Maggi.” During those sixteen years it appears that the body had quite an adventure. It was owned by a military official, took a bizarre tour around Europe, was damaged by a hammer and many wax copies were made of it. One official was said to have had sex with one copy of the corpse.
  • “Don’t cry for me, Argentina, I remain very near to you,” are the words inscribed on Evita’s tomb figure
  • Although the Elvis Presley’s undertaker didn’t want anything to be placed in the coffin with him, for fear of theft, he did actually allow Lisa Marie to place a small bracelet on her father’s wrist. The bracelet was covered by the king’s sleeve so nobody could see it.
  • Sid Vicious of the Sex Pistols wanted his ashes to be put with his late soul-mate Nancy. Instead his request never came to pass, as his mother accidentally dropped them on the runway of Heathrow airport.
  • Queen Victoria wanted to feel close to her long-dead husband while being laid to rest. She insisted on being buried with Prince Albert’s bathrobe, and a plaster cast of his hand.
  • Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the the universe.” Albert Einstein left behind many memorable quotes upon his death, but unfortunately no one knows what is final words were. The nurse at his bedside did not speak German so his words died with him! He probably chose that moment to reveal the secret of life….

 

  • Who better to sing at Pavarotti’s funeral than the late tenor himself? A recording of Pavarotti and his father singing “Panis Angelicus” filled his hometown cathedral as the mourners were led out.

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